She Walked Away Once More

Sometimes she thinks she is not good enough, no matter what I tell her. She is a strong, smart, beautiful woman. She is certainly good enough. She is amazing. What did I do wrong? That she does not listen to me hurts deeper than she realizes. She walks away thinking she cannot serve me well enough, or so she says. I don’t know. I only know for certain it pulls me down. What did I do wrong? I don’t know.

“Mood Indigo” by Duke Ellington, Barney Bigard and Irving Mills (as sung by Nat King Cole)

You ain’t been blue,
No, no, no,
You ain’t been blue,
Till you’ve had that mood indigo.

That feelin’
Goes stealin’ down
To my shoes,
While I
Sit an’ sigh,
Go ’long blues.

Always get that mood indigo,
Since my baby said goodbye.
In the evenin’ when lights are low,
I’m so lonesome, I could cry.

’Cause there’s nobody,
Who cares about me,
I’m just a soul
Who’s bluer than blue can be.
When I get that mood indigo,
I could lay me down an’ die.

You ain’t been blue,
No, no, no,
You ain’t been blue,
Till you’ve had that mood indigo.

That feelin’
Goes stealin’ down
To my shoes,
While I
Sit an’ sigh,
Go ’long blues.

No idea why the image is of a helicopter. It is just the only Nat King Cole version I found on the youtube. I know other people have sung it, but this the version I first heard, and the one that echos most in my head.

And just because I feel like it, Cab Calloway sings “St. James Infirmary Blues”, another song that echoes in my head.

No one in this situation died, but I can’t help but go to “Paint It Black” by the Rolling Stones. It’s just my mood. Black and sad.

In case you had not noticed, I’m feeling kinda down.

I will recover. I always do.

I just… I don’t know.

4 Responses to “She Walked Away Once More”

  1. I’m sorry you’re sad. 😦

    Sometimes people can’t be convinced they are good; they need to discover it for themselves. Sometimes all you can do is hold their hand along the way. Be a positive force in her negative world.

  2. It’s okay to be sad sometimes, I find those periods make me ponder my situations more thoroughly. Yesterday, I was pretty down but feel much better today. We’re here for you ~<3~

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