Today, Something Different

The situation has changed. How? I try not to spend much time on personal things here. So rather than try to explain something that was impossible has happened, I offer just these songs without further comment.

100 Responses to “Today, Something Different”

  1. twiztedone Says:

    I am a major Sinatra fan, right along with the Beatles. Not so much a Barbra fan lol Nicely put though.

  2. Is anyone else puzzled by whether Sinatra is singing about the second time around with a former flame or a new flame… I listen to this and think of my now fiancé after I became more open to the idea of dating following a rough others take it?

  3. Sir,
    Would it be okay if I asked you a couple of questions, envolving the relationship between a Dom/Sub?

    • Yes, Sierra, of course you may.

      • Sir, please correct me if I’m wrong but the foundation to a healthy Dom/Sub relationship is trust and understanding correct ?

      • Might I also ask if in a proper Dom/Sub relationship the Dom would take the subs limitations in consideration and desires as well,but only if the sub behaves in an orderly fashion?
        Thank you very much for agreeing to take some of your precious time in order to answer some of the questions I have Sir.

        • Sir, these are my last two questions since I do not want to take to much of your precious time. Though hopefully whenever I have a question I could possibly come to your blog and ask with hope that you’d have the time to answer it Sir. Is Fetlife a trustworthy site? And also since I am a great bit younger then most and not quite eligible for the site, would you recommend I continue to research and have patience until I am eligible to join Sir?

          • Fetlife has uses, but as a place to meet Dominants I cannot recommend it. In any case, you should take your time to learn about submission and about yourself before you join Fetlife or any other such site. There are dishonest people who would prey on young and inexperienced submissives. The more you know about submission and yourself, and what you want from D/s, the better off you will be when you finally do look for a Dominant. Do not rush into D/s. Grow and learn to be you. When the time comes for D/s, it will happen naturally.

        • For the D/s relationship to be built on trust and understanding, the Dominant and the submissive need to know and respect the expectations of each other. So yes, the Dominant should consider the limitations and desires of the submissive, and she should do no less for the Dominant.

  4. This statement is true Sir, I am sorry I am just eager to learn but patience is important I am aware of this now. If I ever have more questions would you, if you could ever find the time, be okay with possibly answering some of them ? If not I understand.Thank you for your time
    Forever grateful,

  5. Sir, I don’t like these songs. Especially the Beatles. I hate the Beatles.

    • I am not sure if you are kidding or not, Amelia. Either way, your liking or disliking them does not matter. They are not here for you. They are here for me.

      • Sir, I thought they were here for everyone. And of course I’m kidding. You know I like the Beatles.

        • I am sharing them with everyone. But they are here for me.

        • Hey Amelia, as unusual as this may sound I was hoping you’d hit the comments section up at some point so I could ask you a few questions.

          • I’m not taking questions today. Come back next week. Would you like to ask me questions on the Beatles? I can’t promise I’ll answer any other questions for you.

          • Come back next week. Questions on the Beatles. You’re cute. But no questions on them. So that’s a no then from you?

          • Amelia, I’m going ahead with the question. You choose whether you want to answer or not. Do you see yourself as being or would you like to one day be someone’s submissive? I don’t even know you but from what comes forth of your personality through things you’ve commented here you seem interesting and lovely, someone one would like to know.

          • She’s mine.

          • Josh, you seem pretty eager to get your question answered. But what you’re asking is a topic for a private discussion that you have not earned yet. Oh, what’s that? You want me to put the joking aside and get to the question? Okay, you tell me, what do you think of the concept of being in a relationship where you’re rewarded and punished as someone else sees fit for basically the entire course of the relationship which who knows could last years or even a lifetime. Do you think this is realistically achievable? Do you know of any couples who have grown old in a D/s relationship??? Ooh never thought of that now did you.

          • Hey now. I object. You are misrepresenting D/s and then criticizing it. That is called a strawman argument. Is a healthy, long-term D/s relationship achievable? Of course it is. That it does not seem common to you does not make it unrealistic or impossible.

          • Yes, I would have to agree with Xajow. That you have your doubts about the possibility of a successful long term D/s relationship does not make the thing impossible, Amelia. Hard to maintain, sure, but certainly not impossible. Your answer was a great example of one thing, however, and I’ll tell you what. How to avoid answering a question. You avoided my question completely. From what you’ve said you seem to not be interested in being a submissive in a D/s relationship though I could be wrong. You may simply be voicing your questions about the whole thing. Is it the idea of punishment that puts you off perhaps?

          • Oh, I’m interested in pretty much everything and D/s is no exception. The same way I have my doubts about everything. In a relationship, it’s more than just wishing to submit to him. You want his leadership too. The guidance. A man who tells me what to do is sexy. The idea of punishment? Hmmm. Mmmm. What do you think of the idea of punishment, Josh? Okay, no I’m kidding. I’m not avoiding this question. It’s hard to trust someone to be fair and just with punishments and rewards. I don’t know. I have a lot of questions. Do you think I’m criticising D/s by talking the way I am? I don’t think so. I just have questions. Tell me you agree with me on this matter at least or I’ll pout about it if I come to read your comment and you’re disagreeing with me again.

          • No, Amelia, I don’t think you’re criticising D/s. Question it all you want. The good thing is you’re not naive and you’re raising good questions. Though I’m sure you look cute pouting I can’t say I disagree with you. What you refer to as being “fair” with punishments and rewards sounds a little like you think you get to decide what punishment is fair or what reward you should recieve and it doesn’t work like that. But I understand the context you’re referring to. Some of your questions would no doubt be best answered by Xajow.
            Would you describe yourself as submissive? And you don’t have to put the jokes aside when answering questions. I find them amusing, it’s cute.

          • I can tell you think it’s cute. It’s nice when someone can take a joke. Okay, so it’s the Dominants judgment on what is fair or appropriate as a punishment or reward that counts. Got it. But there’s nothing wrong with communicating how you feel about a punishment, right? Right. Or would that call for another punishment?? Can you imagine that? That would be so harsh. As far as being submissive goes, it depends. If I described myself as submissive in the presence of some people they’d laugh and take it as a joke or sarcasm, there’d be confusion and comments flying around telling me I’m not. But then it might be a different story altogether with someone specific. Some people have fixed personality types and others aren’t so clear cut. Asking Xajow sounds like a great idea. I’ll try it.

          • You can tell? Maybe because you’re used to being called cute so it doesn’t come as a surprise to you when someone thinks you are. Which you are. I’m still not sure whether to take Jason’s earlier comment seriously or not but he’s bound to say something after I’ve said all this. It is up to the dominant to decide on punishments and rewards but being open with your dominant is crucial and that would include discussing anything you’re apprehensive about, or have questions on.

          • Jason’s on one.

          • Amelia, I have no idea what that means.

          • It means she thinks real men go slow.

  6. Sir, that is understandable. Might I ask that if I had a question for you and I knew that I had permission to ask but most likely wouldn’t get an answer or if so a very general one,would it make sense to ask ?
    Forever Grateful,

    • I am not sure what you mean. You are welcome to ask any question. If there is a problem with it, I would say so.

      • Sir,
        Please forgive me if I am out of context, but is it by choice that you are subless ? That you haven’t found one that suits you?
        Forever Grateful,

        • Until recently, yes, I was without a submissive by choice. The situation has changed. You are treading very close to very personal questions that I am unlikely to choose to answer. That does not mean you cannot ask the questions, I am just warning that not all questions will be answered.

          • My intentions were never to step on your toes, I know that question can often be the foundation to asking deeper more personal questions, but quite frankly your personal life is none of my business sir. I am sorry if it seemed as though I wanted to over step a boundry, I just simply was curious to why you were subless but now that I have my answer I undestand. No further questions that are close or are stepping over the boundaries of your personal life will be asked. I’m sorry again Sir.
            Forever Grateful,

          • I appreciate your being very polite, Sierra. But you may ask whatever questions you have. I reserve the privilege of choosing to not answer some questions, but you should always feel free to ask me whatever questions are on your mind.

  7. Speaking of questions Sir,
    In the Dom/sub relationship does age often matter ?

  8. Rather then ask what is it, since it’s not hard to understand and also rather than knowing that it is very personal, I would rather like to ask have others tried to confront you about what it’s about sir? What the connection between the songs are ?

  9. Might I say what I think the connection is Sir? and no I’m not asking for you to tell me if I am correct or not I just simply would like to say what I feel it’s about Sir, is that okay?

  10. Sir, I think these songs are based on “the situation has changed” which I assume is you no longer being subless, “something that was impossible has happened” , I think this means that you out of choice had no sub because you didn’t feel a connection with one, or you had but it didn’t workout. This time though the sub you have now she is what you’ve been longing for, she makes you feel. Instead of writing about this since you keep your private life private which is under stable you posted these songs, for yourself to remind you of your sub when you go on this blog and answer questions. Though they are also here for others to enjoy but mainly you.

  11. I should think the songs express a message revolving around finding someone new and learning to be open to the idea of someone new when once such a thing seemed hard and impossible.

  12. If things have changed for you and I believe changed for the better, then I am very glad.I am more than glad I am delighted for you.
    I Sir,have had an epipthany.You could say the penny has dropped and its very cold and its dropped down my back.Brrr.
    I am too afraid to get back on the bike, horse or even unicyle 🙂
    The failing is mine I’m more than ashamed to say.I won’t blame my Ex Dom for this.
    Yes he became so very dark and yes he hurt and crushed me. But I pathetically allowed myself to stay hurt and crushed all this time. My fault.
    From today I shall be lifting my head up high and not dropping my eyes until whatever deity decides there is a Dom strong and able to guide, teach and own me. If that isnt to be so be it.
    Thank you for your blog it has lifted my heart and spirit.

    • Thank you, Freya. You are worthy of a good Dominant who will love and care for you. Remember that, and you will find a good Dominant. I am certain of it.

  13. Josh, don’t mind Jason’s comments. He’s being silly. Not that I disapprove but you shouldn’t take his comments seriously.

    • See, it’s why I can be silly. Because she doesn’t disapprove. I basically live to please her so it only makes sense.

      • Wow. I’m assuming you know each other. And I suppose, Amelia, that you’d be more interested or inclined towards a relationship where you’re in control. If you find any of these questions too personal, forgive me and do let me know.

    • I like the way you talk about things, Amelia. I like how your mind works. You’re sexy.

      • This is all just getting a bit too much now. Mia, when you come to read this, just keep in mind that I’m a jealous Dom. And that you’re mine. You’d do well to remember it.

  14. Oh my… will there be a fight ? The studded gauntlet thrown down? Paddles at dawn? May I watch and score please?… I can bring cake ?

    • This is my last jokey comment! In answer to your question Josh, no I’m not more inclined towards a relationship where I’m in control. I don’t want someone I can wrap around my little finger.

      • Amelia, what’s wrong with having someone you can wrap around your little finger?

        • Nothing’s wrong with it. At least not at first. Eventually it starts to bore me. It’s deathly boring. Oh, I could die of boredom just thinking about it. Please, don’t make me think about it.

          • Think about dominance then. My guess is you are open to the idea of being a D/s relationship.

          • Amelia, I left you a comment on another post, In Which I answer Some Questions About Submissiveness. Just to let you know in case you haven’t gotten round to reading it yet.

  15. That was so sweet of you, Pamela for sharing what you did. You mentioned my Dominant, he is not mine yet and I’m not his submissive yet either but it’s going there and I can’t approach it the way you do most relationships when you’re my age, rushing and diving straight into the deep end so a rational approach is needed more than luck, I think. But you try being rational and always fail, amirite? But I think the most sincere thing to do would be to give yourself to it, or him. I’m trying to depersonalise this as much as possible because it’s actually making me feel slightly shy talking about this the way I am as weird as that is. As far as things not working out goes, I think this will be the first time and the last, I don’t wish to try again with another Dominant or become better for someone else, if I’m going to do this I want to be the best for him. Maybe I’m viewing this far too romantically or idealistically or whatever the right word is. I hope I don’t learn the hard way! At least not yet. It makes me nervous thinking about it like that. I don’t even know what I’m saying! I wonder if you met an ex submissive of your first Dominant? The idea itself is pretty intimidating. I mean, here’s two people who’ve had so much history together and they know their stuff and you’re the little newbie. Meeting someone’s ex is always awkward even if it may be for educational purposes. I can imagine myself hiding behind him while he’s trying to introduce me and I’m just like no, I feel shy. No, I’m kidding (kind of). I think I rambled a little here.

    • Sweetheart you’re so precious talking the way you are and I totally understand. I also apologize, I got the impression you had a Dominant. Have you communicated how you feel with regards to him, it is so wonderful he’ll melt over you!! I did not intend to make you nervous at all, no, I was referring to my own Dominant at the time, he was strict and I learnt everything the hard way. Not an experience I would change. I grew as a submissive while serving him more than I anticipated I would. But enough about me. I did not meet his ex-submissive in the context you seem to be referring to. No, it was in a very different situation but I understand also your nervousness regarding this. If you are not comfortable seeing her now or ever, let him know. If this is just a case of nerves before meeting someone new then by all means go for it and ask her as much as you can. It is a great opportunity getting to communicate with a woman who has been a potential Dominant’s submissive. She could provide you with a lot of insight into the experience or really anything you wish to know more about. Even him if you’re comfortable with that. How should I say this? My own jealousy got the better of me and I did not use this opportunity, which would have been helpful had I put it aside. Everyone begins as a newbie. No shame in that. I’ll add that his ex-submissive was still harboring feelings whatever those may have been so it was not entirely my fault. You are very intelligent, Amelia, I’m certain he knows this too. Don’t worry too much. x

    • To say this man is lucky would be an understatement but I’ll leave you with that, Amelia.

  16. Hi Amelia, Hi Pamela.
    what an inspirational post Pamela and what a heart felt response Amelia.
    I know I of all women here am in no position to even dare offer advice. But I will say talk, discuss, negotiate and then talk some more with your possible future Dominant.
    You strike me as someone doesn’t do half
    But embracing this lifestyle is about learning to be the best you can, together with your Dom guiding and encouraging you.I won’t wish you luck but I will wish you great happiness and fulfilment.
    As for meeting his previous sub Good grief no.I am right with you there. With my luck she would sweetly tell me he loves salt in his coffee and he would just adore me to leap on him just like Cato from Pink Panther when he comes home from a hard day.:)

    • Thank you, Freya. I really can relate to the myriad of questions that runs through a girl’s mind when she is first introduced to the lifestyle which is what prompted me to post. I have to say, it is one of the trickier things in a relationship, the meeting of an ex partner. Maybe this is only so for me. As for Amelia, I see the possibility of wedding bells ringing already!! Babies too, oh the whole lot!! Mind you, I might be getting carried away with this but this is my hope for you in the future, certainly not now.

      • “what happens if I get pregnant?” is actually a good question to ask a prospective Dominant.

    • You’re very sweet Freya, for offering the advice you did. I appreciate and welcome it so feel free to impart any wisdom or chip in with an answer to a question. And thank you Pamela for your reply. I do wish to see her, though I don’t think I’ll be asking her any questions on him, as curious as I may be. I wouldn’t know what possible question to ask her about him that I wouldn’t be able to ask him directly. He did suggest quite early on that he could get me a mentor which is helpful considering the mentor in question has had experience in the path but I figured talking to a woman whose had experience being his submissive would be better, and so he arranged for that. Do you think having a mentor is a good idea? I’m thinking yes, at least until this initial stage of shyness that seems to have taken over me blows over. Asking him what happens if I get pregnant sounds like a funny question. I’m shying away from asking certain questions about D/s and protocol so asking about anything related to pregnancy is out of the question for now. And on the topic of babies, my biological clock hasn’t started ticking yet so I’m fine enjoying sleepless nights that have nothing to do with screaming babies.
      Question time! I’ve never been one to shy away from asking for things I enjoy so I’m fine in this respect. But when it comes to punishments, was it something you feared when you were with your first Dominant?

      • don’t shy away from asking the important questions. i don’t see what’s wrong with squirming and blushing with bashful unease while asking your Dominant this question.nor can i imagine there exists a man who wouldn’t enjoy seeing his submissive in such a state. sure he intimidates you so you feel shy but that’s sexy i feel sexiest when a man can make me blush the way my teenage self would have done while talking to a crush.

  17. Bless you Pamela thanks.
    I will wait patiently.

  18. Just having a Sir and not being alone will be more than i can hope for.

  19. Hey Amelia. A mentor should be a grand idea.
    Wish I had had one then. The questions that
    we may feel too daft or silly to our Dom
    directly but niggle away at us anyway can be answered and our minds put to rest. I had a ton of them but kept them to myself.
    I can honestly say I wasn’t terribly afraid of the corrections initially. We did the talking and discussing and started out slow and gentle.
    I was still anxious,shaking and excited . My
    teeth chattered so loudly. I wanted to please him so desperately.
    I never met another sub until about 4 months
    into our relationship. I wasn’t permitted to
    research or ask questions of the other subs when I finally met them. They were big stapping lasses and quite a bit older than me I am tiny I felt a bit intimidated… ok a lot intimidated.
    Ha I was the very epitome of a mushroom
    This will be so scary, exciting, rewarding and
    sexy. I am grinning so widely for you. Please
    dont believe her if she tells you he loves salt in
    his coffee right

  20. Ps Amelia.
    I re read my post this morning. I really want to clarify. Whilst I felt intimidated by other subs they all were in fact lovely to me, offering to help and advise. (Which I had to politely decline due to his explicit command.)
    Everyone within the community will be kind and friendly and will make you feel very welcome.
    Your journey onwards is going to be such a beautiful one .You will learn so much about yourself and your Dom will help and guide you. He must be something special or you wouldn’t be embarking on this. Best wishes to you both

    • Hello Amelia, you should definitely take him up on that offer of a mentor. I really could write an entire book on my experience with punishments!! Yet I needed the punishments just as much as I disliked and feared them. I say dislike, but what I mean is the feeling and sense of disappointment that came with knowing I had displeased my Dominant. It was for this reason alone that I needed him to punish me. It was the only way I could be at peace again and it reminded me of his control and dominance over me. Yes, the idea of punishment sounds scary but the purpose is not to scare you away but more so an intensification of the power dynamics in a D/s relationship. Every time you get punished or rewarded even you become more so his than the last time, submitting to his control and accepting that which pleases him and absolves you. The sharp sting of a spanking is nothing compared to the feeling of failing that overcomes one when master is displeased. You will learn this in due time. He must adore you, it sounds like he is willing to do all he can to help and guide you on this journey.

      • Freya, I promise I will not fall for it if she tells me he likes salt in his coffee! I’m not sure if I want to meet the other women who have served him as a submissive. I think one is enough or it might get a little complicated. What did they help and advise you on? How best to serve him? I’m intimidated by him and the experience he’s had more than I am by anyone else who has been a part of his life in the past, and I’m also intimidated by the standard against which my submission will be measured but I love feeling intimidated in this way. I’m expecting at least some level of surprise when she meets me, she won’t be expecting someone my age so the idea of not being taken seriously because of my age makes me a little nervous.
        Pamela, you’re right. My honest true feeling is that I want to have it his way, everything, and I’ll love it because he loves it. I also think each question has it’s time. I don’t think I’ll blush so much as succumb to a giggle fit asking him about pregnancy. This uncontrollable laughter thing has happened before but others were present, smiling, confused about what I was laughing so uncontrollably about until he told me to excuse myself from the table and come back when I had calmed down. Yeahhh that shut me up good. Do I want a repeat of that episode??? Psh, like it’s up to me to decide if such a thing will happen again.

        • Goodness, what on earth made you laugh like that after all?! In all honesty, such a thing can happen to the best of us. Seeing as everyone was smiling it cannot have been too bad. Hopefully he took it well and was not too annoyed? The way you talk of him and your approach to submission is so sweet and heartfelt. Don’t, whatever you do, put too much pressure on yourself. Enjoy it all. Just to add this, I agree that seeing more than one ex-submissive might make things a little too complicated than need be at the stage you’re in now. Take your time with everything. And yes, that includes questions, excluding those you feel you are not ready to ask. You’ll be fine. x

          • It was just a silly joke someone whispered to me. And seeing the person opposite me stifle his own laughter by pretending to sip from his glass mixed with the silence and smiles around the table while I giggled only made it worse. I did apologise once we were alone! And no, much to my surprise and relief he wasn’t annoyed at all. Anyway, thank you, Pamela for your words of encouragement and advice. And thank you Robynzr8. I appreciate your suggestion but for now I’m just focusing on learning more about myself and him too. Figuring out my immediate goals and living in the moment. Also Pamela, do you presently have a Dominant?

  21. amelia you’re welcome. so the question i proposed you ask does not strike you as important?

    • as an almost 30 something now i haven’t asked any one of my partners, whether it was vanilla or otherwise the “baby question” in the way that robyn you’ve phrased it. that question is only important if her dominant or amelia herself wants a family. i’d say her dominant would have discussed it while he was pursuing her if he saw this as a non-negotiable dealbreaker but this is just my view take it or leave it. doing things the way your partner wants is risky, love, i’d know. self-enforced boundaries are of utmost importance for a healthy D/s relationship.

  22. Oh my. Being the center of attention when you least want it!! Glad you made it through that without being berated by him. If you haven’t guessed already he likes you. A lot it seems. You are most welcome Amelia. My Master and I are actually engaged.

  23. I think my enthusiasm must have clouded my point when I said what I did. Everyone has what they like and we all know what missing it or lack of what we desire or are satisfied by does to us. I don’t want to make him feel that. You give when you submit. Your submission is not taken. Being forced to do things in a way that pleases another person is not what I’m referring to. This is not about being overcome or pressured. Think of it as two people doing things in a way that is equally satisfying to both parties. You do not need to have things your way at another person’s expense but instead as to their benefit. You know, mutual exploration. I’m not going to say all he wants is sunshine, roses, and wholesome white picket fence happiness and it stops there. It’s just what he wants and that’s sufficient for me. Some people aren’t too into that mushy gushy, easy peasy lemon squeazy kind of thing. Not everyone loves in a sappy kind of way. Maybe high-challenge, risky, intense relationships do it for some people. You can challenge and balance one another at the same time. Yeah I know what you’re thinking. Isn’t that emotionally, mentally, physically exhausting?? Sure. But the exhaustion from it all becomes pleasurable when it’s intensifying and strengthening what you have with that person and it can make the intimacy you share with that person really powerful. Boundaries are important but it requires a certain kind of abandon to give yourself completely to a person, in a way no ones ever had you, in a way no one ever will again.

    • That’s a very well made point. I saw your comment on being 19, not ready for a D/s relationship on another post and now someone’s got you speaking so well on the matter. Damn girl. You have an edge about you that I can sense even through written text haha. Which is a good thing. Of course provided there is trust and communication everything else falls into place. Mind you, I did not think like you when I had my first D/s relationship so I shouldn’t be giving out unsolicited advice. I’m actually a little astounded at everything you’ve said. Again, a good thing.

    • hey is it weird that “easy peasy lemon squeazy” made me laugh a little. so anyways amelia some questions i hope you can answer:
      – how do you get a dominant to like you? sounds weird yeah but i see they’re a little harder to please?.. i guess than normal men. quick to pounce on you and just as quick to discard when youi kind of suck at keeping your ‘submissive side’ in check. ask my ex. so like what’s your go to seduction method other than be yourself just to amp up the appeal
      – and you said you weren’t ready -sorry, stalking your comments here but seems like it ain;t just mee- so how do you know youre ready now and how do you know you want to be submissive for him-other than that hes a sexy beast- if someone told me to leave a table full of people to calm down i’d be all over him aftewards holy hotness eekk. i.e physical attractiveness

      thanks :))

    • Amelia, what makes you decide this will be your last time in a serious relationship with a Dominant? You obviously find authority sexy, having mentioned you like feeling intimidated. He intimidates you. Though how do you know for sure you won’t at some point in the future want a relationship where you’re an equal? To be clear, I don’t mean to criticize. Simply interested to see what you have to say. I find your approach to this very impressive, especially at your age. He’s lucky. I’m sure also for other reasons only he knows of.

      • Okay, what makes me decide this will be my last serious relationship with a Dominant? Lots of things.
        How do I know I won’t at some point want a relationship where I’m an equal? That unequal word has connotations of inferiority which I don’t feel. Are you defining being an equal in a relationship on the grounds of control, how much control you exercise in that relationship? Do you think an equal relationship is one in which you’re sharing control with another person? I don’t understand how this ties in with intimidation either. Other than the superficial things that come with an intimidating person, feeling intimidation comes in part from a sense of admiration for the person someone is. Respect. If I was a man I’d want to be like him. In fact I’d want to be him. Something like that.

    • Oh wow..
      “You can challenge and balance one another at the same time.” Now that is something special. He really must be quite something or you wouldn’t be embarking on this and certainly not with such enthusiasm and the things you’ve touched upon. A dominant is not the only one who challenges and thus enables his submissive to grow. It goes both ways. Your last line is so very sexy. Your all or nothing approach is just.. wow.

  24. Hello Amelia,

    what is your opinion on poly relationships? If you should deem these as personal questions, by all means do refuse to answer. I ask because I want to serve my Dom in every way that pleases him. I crave this connection but I simply do not feel I will be able to have it in a poly relationship. He is not mine. If I am being shared I don’t feel I am his completely either. What you said about giving yourself completely to someone is what I want, just one person, my Dom. What would you do if you were me? In my place would you acquiesce to such a relationship: being shared. He controls when I am shared but I of course have no say in the choices he makes in regards to other submissive women. I have said no, this is a hard limit for me, he has given me time to contemplate my stance on it yet I still feel it is a definitive no. I guess I’m very territorial for a submissive lol.

    • Shania, you should be with someone who will respect your wish for an exclusive, monogamous relationship and who wants the same. Do you truly want what he wants? No. You clearly don’t and if you go ahead with such an arrangement you will only be making that choice for the sake of doing what he wants. Not because you genuinely want what he wants. It will only lead to a lot of emotional damage and pretending. The most sincere thing you can do for him and yourself is to respect his choice and respect him enough to be honest with him. Your fulfilment from this relationship is just as important as his. So if you’re clearly not compatible in this respect, say so and stand by your choice. In your place I wouldn’t acquiesce to such a thing. Honestly, I wouldn’t be able to take him or the relationship seriously if such a thing was suggested to me. And supposing I was able to agree to it, it would be out of a lack of commitment and genuine care on my side.

      • Shania Says:

        Oh that’s exactly it. I think about it and I realise I would only be able to go through with this if and only if some sort of emotional attachment and care factor was lacking in me, something lacking in what I feel for him, only then would it be possible. I am so so thankful for your response. It has clarified something for me that I didn’t consider. Doing what he wants for the sake of it. And I long to be honest and genuine with him no matter the price or how hard it is. Thank you again, Amelia. You’re a dream. Really, you’re an awesome girl.

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