Project August: Day 6 – The Hunger of a Dominant

Okay, students, pay attention. I know some of you have questions about how a Dominant thinks, what does a Dominant need, and what drives a person to want to be a Dominant in a D/s relationship. So pay attention. I am going to talk about these things from a personal perspective. You may not fully understand all of it, but know that your understanding is not required.

Yes, cute girl with the spanking skirt in the front row, what is your question? No, I have not forgotten about Project August. I am responding to a post from Unraveling MaríMar (go for the sexy gifs, stay for the marvelous exploration of submission), called simply “Hunger”. It asks a straightforward question.

Is there any hunger more intense than that of a Dominant?

Perhaps there are desires as intense, but none more intense than the hunger of a Dominant. He craves few things lightly. And make no mistake, this is not a hunger for food. No, this is a hunger for the pleasure of his submissive. And yes, I speak of Dominant men. Sorry Dominant women, I will not pretend to speak for your desires. If that offends you, too bad.

When a Dominant hungers for the pleasure of his submissive, his soul demands to have it as soon as possible. And he will take it. 

This is a strange thing in our society of feminism and sensitive men who are, supposedly, ideally to worship the women they love. To want to grab a woman by the hair and pull her close for kiss taken not given, this is frowned upon in our society.

And so a Dominant man covets the pleasure of his submissive, even when he is without a submissive of his own. There is a longing to feel her warmth and her breath and her skin. There exists the desire to grab and hold a woman who willingly gives herself to his control. To pull her body close without permission, without needing permission. To grab her hair and pull her to her knees, knowing her knees grow weak the moment his hand touches her hair.

Why does a Dominant crave these things? Why is his hunger for them so strong? Because to him these are things of unparalleled beauty. His soul aches to see it, to know it, to have it. It is the beauty of a clear stream of water in a vast desert. All around there is nothing to satisfy, but this one stream of water. All around there is so much emptiness, so much that leaves him unfulfilled, but his submissive is the stream that alone can quench his thirst. His submissive feeds his soul and gives him the feeling of being truly alive.

Am I romanticizing what is really just sexist, chauvinistic hubris? No! Do not confuse the desire of a Dominant with the desire of a misogynist. The Dominant seeks not to crush and oppress. The Dominant seeks what the submissive seeks: happiness, fulfillment and love. In the history of the world, no sensitive and giving man in a vanilla relationship is more intent on such things than is a strong and sure Dominant in a Dominance/submission relationship.

When a man recognizes that he is dominant by nature, he is a fool to if he thinks his path will be easy. To be a Dominant in modern society is to be misunderstood, to be considered the next thing to an abuser of women for pleasure. It is to find the ordinary unsatisfying and find vanilla relationships shallow. It is to see the relationship games people play as so much dross.

And so begins the hunger. The hunger for that submissive who is, to his mind, better than the ordinary. Better because she has the beauty that others lack. Better because what his soul craves is not lesser than that of other men, but greater. It is a hunger that goes down to the very core of who he is. It is not easily satisfied. And, truth be told, he does not want it to be.

No, Dominant men are not perfect. We are not made of anything other than the same mortal clay as other men. But what we desire is something extraordinary. And finding it, we hunger for it no less. It is our favorite emotional and mental meal. We consume it and want more. We desire to be ourselves. We desire to be bare and unhidden from the submissive who will embrace us with eager arms. We desire to hold that treasure that is the submissive woman. It is a need, a hunger within that never truly dies, never truly is ever fully satisfied.

Is there a hunger more intense than that of a Dominant? No, there is not. Not in all the world.

Sigh.

Okay, students, class dismissed.

You, cute girl in the spanking skirt, in my office in five minutes. Clearly we need to discuss dress code issues.